It's weird. I seem to have my life under control, despite having little free time. I have evenings, but no days off which is a bummer. In any case, I keep feeling like I'm running so fast that my legs will give out, yet they don't. So despite the fact that I hate running this fast, and feel like I'm always on the verge of failing...I don't...and that makes it worse. I stresses me out that things are going so smoothly because I feel like they must be right on the verge of falling apart.

As an extension of that, I now attach even more stress to the small things that would usually only stress me a little.

In other, and more important news, we have a new president. A black president none the less. I'm excited to say the least, but for some reason not as much as I feel I should be. I mean, it's been kind of expected all along. It feels like when you would pull an all nighter with friends when you were a kid. You were all excited at first saying "this is going to be awesome!" and you spend the whole night playing video games. But by morning you just really want to go home and sleep. And while it was fun, and you're glad it happened, you're just glad it's over and you can move on.

Busy busy busy. I hate being busy. Lets see, there are 168 hours in a week. Sleeping roughly 7 hours a night that's 49 hours of sleep, 45 hours of work and 12 hours of class. Bringing me to about 62 hours of free time in a week. Most of that is stacked between my classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays, which I usually use to do homework, or at least plan out my homework. While this may not seem like a big deal to some people (I know there are a lot of people way more busy than me, ie my roommate Jason) it has been hard to handle.

I went from getting 9 or so hours of sleep a night, working roughly 15 hours a week and having very little to do, to this new schedule. It has taken a lot of getting used to. I still haven't adjusted to it fully but I'm trying. I just miss having any extended period of time to myself. I have a few evenings a week but that's really just spent trying to wrap up loose ends of the week while relaxing as much as possible before bed. All I want is even a half day off a week, just a chunk of time where I don't have to do ANYTHING!

...anyways, I hope the antidepressants help, should start kicking in a couple weeks from now